January holds so much hope for the future. And this year it is not only the beginning of a new year, but also a new decade. So much potential and possibility exists!
When I think about all of the things that have happened in my own life over the last 10 years, and even just this past year, it makes me excited to see what the future holds.
This month we have discussed the importance of reflecting on the past, and accepting where we are in the present as crucial first steps to creating goals and plans. And they really are crucial.
Today I reveal the final step: connect with the future.
Yes, the future. Your future.
I recognize that thinking about the future, in the way I am about to describe it, may be a new experience for many of you. I hope that you will give it a try. I promise there are no chants, songs, or incense to burn. That is, unless you want to.
This isn’t an exercise that you will want to rush, either. Block off some quiet time, turn off the notifications, put pen to paper and see what future awaits you.
Who will you be a year from now?
Think about who you will become, and what you will have accomplished a year from now.
“If you want to change, you must have in your thoughts an idealized self.”
Joe Dispenza, Breaking The Habit Of Being Yourself
Can you see her?
Can you describe her?
Start writing.
These questions will require your brain to tap into skills that may have laid dormant for some time. Skills like imagination and creativity. It may be challenging at first and that’s okay. You are up for a challenge!
Your brain will naturally resist those things that are not immediately familiar. But you know how to do it, you’ve done it before. It seems as if all children have the ability to imagine wild and wonderful things. And we all start out as children. Imagining is a skill that once forgotten, just needs to be remembered and practiced.
Be like a child and reignite your imagination.
Answering these questions will move your brain from what is the default mode (past focused) into unknown territory, something that does not yet exist in the future. Dream big and often.
“If you can’t dream it, you can’t do it.”
Martha Beck, Finding Your Own North Star
So, who will you be a year from now?
Now that you have an idea of who you will be next year it is time to give her a voice. Speak about what you’ve done in the first person, using pasts tense. For example, “I have become someone who creates a budget and sticks to it.”
Next, state out loud what result you will have. “I have paid off $60,000 in debt.”
Here is another example, “I have become someone who doesn’t eat her emotions” and “I have a closet full of new clothes two sizes smaller than last year.”
Most of us think the way life works is that we achieve a specific result (like paying off debt or losing weight) and then we become the person who has that result. But that’s not really how it works. The easiest way to create any result is to BECOME the kind of person that has the result.
What would that person be thinking, feeling, and doing?
The process of becoming creates the result, not the other way around.
Pretend that your future self has already accomplished this goal, and then tell yourself how you did it.
My favorite way of doing this is to write myself a letter. Now, this isn’t just any letter. This letter is written from your future self of next year (the one you have just been describing), to yourself right now. This year. Today.
I know it sounds confusing. Use your imagination and what you have already discovered about who you want to be. In this letter, you will be giving yourself advice.
Here are some prompts to help you get started:
What would she tell you to stop doing?
What would she tell you to start doing?
What would she thank you for?
What encouragement would she give you?
What else might she say?
A little warning. When you start to tell yourself how you did it from the future, your mind is going to rebel. For as long as it can remember, it has made decisions by looking at what you’ve already done in the past because it’s safe and predictable. In response to the unpredictable nature of the future, it is going to come up with all sorts of reasons why it won’t work. See if any of these sound familiar:
- That’s just how I have always done it.
- That doesn’t work for me; I have tried it.
- I’ve had this issue my entire life.
- This is just how I am.
- I am not the kind of person who can do that.
- I’ve always been overweight; it’s just who I am.
- I am not a very good athlete.
- This isn’t a good time.
- My profession makes it impossible/My husbands profession makes it impossible.
It’s okay to have these thoughts come up and perfectly normal. Since you have already been talking to yourself, engage in a little more. Tell yourself thank you for the warning, and that it doesn’t have to be scared. Everything will be just fine. Trust me, it will.
Write the letter, and read it often. Use it to craft your goals and plans.
“If you want to live a life you’ve never lived, you have to do things you’ve never done.”
Jen Sincero, You Are A Badass
It is time to connect with your future self.
Get excited! Dream big. Become the person who has already accomplished her goal.
Do something differently this year. Reflect. Accept. Connect.
It’s going to be an amazing year!
Photo by Molly Belle on Unsplash
