My daughter turned 8 today and for breakfast, she requested donuts from her favorite bakery.
I woke up 45 minutes earlier than usual so I could get to the bakery and back before she woke up.
The previous evening I decided that I wouldn’t get a dozen donuts like I normally have. I would only get 5. One for each child. No one really needs more than 1 donut, and there would be pie after dinner. We didn’t need donuts.
I was resolute as I made my way on the dark road. I was feeling determined and confident that I would follow through on my plan. It was a good plan.
And then I walked in and felt the familiar longing for a donut. Not just any donut. This bakery has the most amazing croissant donuts. They are so light and delicious.
My mind started to tell me that ordering 5 donuts is just weird and that 6 is normal. I don’t want the lady behind the counter to think I am weird.
My mind told me that it would be perfectly fine to have a donut this morning, after all, it was my daughter’s birthday. It was a special occasion, have a little fun. I want to be the mom that eats donuts.
My mind told me that one donut wouldn’t hurt. After all, I have already lost several pounds and am only a few pounds away from goal (yet again). It will be easy.
My mind told me that I was already planning on having a slice of birthday pie and that a donut wouldn’t make a big difference. It’s not a big deal.
My mind told me that maybe the lady behind the counter would offer me a croissant donut hole, and that it would be rude to refuse. Or maybe she would even give me a bag of donut holes like she has in the past. I couldn’t turn down free donuts.
On and on my mind went trying to convince me that what I had previously decided to do was no longer a good idea. It was screaming “Can’t you see there are donuts here!”
For so many years I gave into every urge and impulse, especially those that were sweet. It was particularly bad whenever my husband was on call, or working long stretches. I often told myself that it was me being good to myself. That I didn’t really have a problem with sweets. That I needed something sweet to take the edge off when it had been a long day. Soon, it was an everyday habit.
Breaking that habit, chasing down the feelings and thoughts that created eating excessive amount of sweets that resulted in always trying to lose the same 5-10 pounds, hasn’t been easy – but the formula has always been simple.
Decide ahead of time what you will do, and then do it.
It works for everything.
So this morning in the donut shop, I paid for my 5 donuts and returned to my car smiling.
I stayed committed to me.
I have made so much progress.
I wasn’t about to let a donut take that away from me. Accumulate the small wins and change your life!
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